Absent God

Absent God
missing in action, always
guardian of open space
blankness in my life.

but more than this
the blankness is for me
a symbol of what God might be
rather than what God is not.

There’s never been a time, God
when I’ve felt your presence
the kind of presence, people
talk about in hushed tones
conjuring up comfortable,
reassuring relationships,
companionship and hot chocolate by the fire.

For me it’s been all hot pokers and awkward questions
flurries of discomfort that reveal, well, nothing.

Could walk away from no-thing
except I find it, you, strangely enticing
attractive, formless, empty space
endless possibility.
For me that is, can’t speak for others.

5 Replies to “Absent God”

  1. Hi Sande great poem .I write verse too.
    In my case I’ve felt the presence of a greater being all my life and have believed there must be a reason for me being here and that I am part of some greater plan ( Just a tiny grain of sand- like part.) Life as a human is so ephemeral that I must believe it is worth something and we are part of something meaningful in the history of the universe. This belief is a source of great comfort and hope .In times of trouble and despair to have the love of God ( however I perceive it/ she or he ) who knows and cares about me gives me strength to carry on. My ex. thought Christians were people who need a crutch and it was a sign of weakness. I disagree !
    The concept of there being nothing after death or leaving this planet and existence ,is anathema to me.I can’t bear to think that I will never be re-united with people I have loved that have gone somewhere, ahead of me. This may be seen as a batty idea or at the very least somewhat foolish and misguided.But I have met people who have not been brought up with any version of ” religion ” that feel the same way. Why is this ?
    I don’t want to be told there is nothing when for me there is something and that helps me ” get through” life which can be very difficult at times.
    I think this is why ” primitive” peoples have had something outside themselves, to believe in, since time immemorial.
    I suppose what I’m saying is I do believe in the supernatural, but it’s impossible to prove one way or another.
    As human kind evolves we may become more sensitive to these things / spirit forces or whatever. For now,for me at least ,that Force ( which has not been forced upon me ! ) comes in the form of God through Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit.Although to many this whole concept is crazy and incomprehensible ,for a lot of people it does make sense. Above all I want to share the love that I feel Jesus was and still is ,all about.
    That’s it. In a nutty she’ll

    1. hi Gillian

      Thanks so much for your feedback and reflections.

      I especially like the grain of sand observation. For me, that becomes more and more relevant as time goes by. Perhaps aging points out the nuttiness of trying to be more than a grain!

      And yes, I agree that it’s likely as we evolve more that we become more aware of the more, rather than being constrained by the need to know everything and have everything under our control. I do see signs of that now and how important scientific discoveries are in that whole process as we become alert to the awe and wonder all around us.

      Thanks again. Really appreciate the engagement.

  2. Feel JUST like this too Sande!!! You have a gift with words to express that which is so difficult. You don’t confirm to the Church mould… nor did I ….

    1. Glad it hit the spot Liz. So, now the challenge, it seems to me, is to find ways to encourage the expression of diverse spiritualities. I guess that’s what my writing is about. Let me know if there are ideas/fragments that you would like me to have a go at.

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